2009 At a Glance…. Notes straight from my diary

This year can be regarded as one of the most interesting years of my lives. To begin with, I was in a state of utter confusion at the beginning of the year. I was not sure where my career was leading. The economic downturn has affected my immediate plans and I was lost which way to go. On a personal level I was blessed to have the support of friends who were pillars of strength during these trying times. With a range of thoughts cluttering my mind, I decided to watch a movie on the very first day of the year and it was none other than Rang De Basanti. I was not sure that this movie will have such an impact on my life. However it did have a significant impact this time, although I had seen this movie a few times earlier.

From thereon things started turning. I decided, I want to be involved socially and decided that I will devote my Sundays and my Mondays to this endeavor. Well, I joined an NGO as a freelancer and started to write a lot. In fact that was my first real attempt at writing my own blogs. I still remember the first article that I wrote was on the terror attacks on Mumbai in mid January and my much to my surprise I thought I did a reasonable job. From thereon I started posting regularly on my blog and my friends did appreciate me on this front.

While all these developments were taking place my interest in my work reduced substantially and I was not enjoying the work I has been doing. I thought it was just a temporary phase and thing will get back to normal after a while. Thereafter, there was a small team outing at Amritsar and it was quite an experience to discover with the friends and colleagues of my office. It was an extremely refreshing experience and I thought, this is what I needed. One significant thing that happened during this trip was a small visit to a rural area near Amritsar. I was really happy to be there and the image of a hut amidst a farm was striking and still acquires a place in my memory.

I came back and it was early February now. The trip refreshed my mind and the very image that I mentioned above haunted me and asked me questions to which I had no answers. I tried my best to get involved in an NGO during this time when I was actually working on the data base of an NGO but it did not give me satisfaction. I wanted to know more, discover more. I asked my best friend (Sachal) on what can be done and I vaguely remember, he replied “Dude …. Follow your Heart

In March I was still very much confused and did not know what was going on. In fact I missed Sachals birthday which was supposedly on 18th of March and I didn’t knew that day that my tenure at my office will only sustain for another month. I remember I spoke to Sachal after that and he said, do the things that you believe in and helped me to draft a resignation letter.

My colleagues were really surprised at m decision and barring the people in my team… (Special thanks to Shachin, Banjeet, Kiran, Amita, Ritika, Syed my ex boss Siddharth Sir … everyone thought that I had basically lost it. I stood firm in my decision and resigned from the office and 18th of April was my last working day.

Once I resigned from my Job, I knew that the challenges ahead aren’t easy and my inexperience in the development sector and lack of any professional qualification will be a great hindrance. At this moment, I thought it was important for me to discover more before I approach any NGO for a volunteering assignment. With this view, I planned a trip to my hometown with the hope of visiting a village and discovering something. I went back home and visited two villages in U.P by the name of Chanderpur and Bichpuri. I got a taste of Rural India there and managed to converse with the local people. I had tried something like this for the first time and I loved every bit of it. I am extremely grateful to my uncle Mr D.P Sinha, who not only accompanied me on this trip but helped me to identify ways in which I was able to discover more. I am also grateful to my friend soumita for been the very person to appreciate my efforts and motivate me on my endeavors.

I came back to Delhi and Visited Pravah for the first time and when I remember my first conversation I realize, how nervous I was. I decided to join two of the volunteering programs of Pravah i.e. Smile (Students Mobilization Initiative for Learning through Exposure) and YFD (Youth for Development) and applied for both of the programs. Although, I was supposed to leave for the orientation campaign in May, I was somehow not able to make it and thus I went for the Orientation camp in June. At this moment my only intent was to join smile and discover something new.

The day finally came when I came to Pravah to leave for the Smile Orientation camp and was feeling really apprehensive and didn’t knew what was supposed to happen. For no reasons I was feeling extremely uncomfortable when I was sitting with 17 other volunteers and realized that the same things will happen again. I will not utter a word my confining myself in my own comfort Zone and will never get out of it. But I am not sure what happened to me and I boldly stated ….Lets introduce ourselves much to the annoyance of the other volunteers. But as they life surprises you jus when you lose all hope…..

The journey of smile was full of enthusiasm, energy and team work. Right from the Antakshari played in the bus…. Till the…. Will meet you phrase on the stand of Lajpat Nagar comprise of a journey of inspiration, motivation and intent. I am extremely thankful to the entire team of Smile especially Neha, Sulabda, for bringing so much energy in all the sessions and activities of Smile Orientation Camp and the yeah we also created our own tribe….. Zingalika Chumbha…. I remember every bit of that camp and admit today that those three days are one of the best days of my life.


We came back and met each other again before leaving for our Rural Internship and for it was Narmada Bachao Andolan. The train journey from Delhi to Khandwa was awesome and it was simply great to complete the journey with Ram. We landed at Khandwa and from thereon another journey began which enabled me to question my own beliefs. Now when I look back and see at the things that we did at NBA, I ask myself …. Why didn’t smile and NBA happened to me before ….The month that I spent there was a tremendous phase in my life and I admit that I still fail to feel that passion which was the essence of the Internship @ Narmada Bachao Andolan. I am extremely grateful to all the activist of NBA and my mentors Alok Da and Shilvi didi for enabling me to learn one of the biggest learning’s of my life.

The internship finally ended but the journey hasn’t. We came back and I got the opportunity to attend a Dharna at Jantar Mantar in context of the R and R bill passed. A few of the Smilers also joined me …. And I still remember the discussion that we had on the road of Jantar Mantar. These are some discussions that are still there in my mind and I thank you all for this. At this moment I will also like to Thank Ershaad Bhai for encouraging me to aspire for greater heights and the discussion that we have had has helped me to go a long way and will always continue to do so.

Finally just a day before the feedback camp, I got the opportunity to be involved in the preparations for the feedback camp and did a lot of crazy stuff. A few of them were stock taking through a checklist, drafting an invitation and the craziest thing was to buy bags and medicines with another smiler…. Who did her RI a month before I did it and it was the first day when I actually met her. It was really crazy…. With the shop keepers getting annoyed by the way we were purchasing stuffs.

The arrangements were finally done and we met for the feedback camp. The essence of the feedback camp was the fact that we found it really difficult to summarize our learning and even three days were less. But we did it amazingly well and got the chance to meet the Smilers from the June batch and within a few minutes there was only one batch, one tea and that was  ers. On the last day of the feedback camp we discussed about Action Projects and then followed the Jashn e Agaaz …. The most unforgettable event I have been part of. I loved every second of it and I am happy that I was there… with all of you … ers ….

It was then the turn of the action projects and we met within a week for the action projects which focused on Active Citizenship, Movie Screenings and Campus Intervention. This period was difficult as we were going back to our lives and taking smile with us… it was a bit complicated …..? But we managed to manage it well … didn’t we … The Smilers were involved in action projects through activities such as designing posters, T shirt, Making Newsletter … Movie screening facilitation … Mock sessions. I will like to one again thank all the Smilers for their involvement which in turn motivated me to do my bit in it… yeah just a confession to make… I was really uncomfortable with facilitating Movie screening and I am really if I did disappoint you on that front. However it was a great learning experience and today I am really confident of facilitating Sessions now.

It was great to hear the news that I was short listed for the Youth for Development Program as well and I couldn’t believe my luck. Another journey commenced and the best part is that the first journey did not end while the second was on. I got the opportunity to meet another group of 13 exciting minds and the orientation camp was an amazing blend of intensity and fun. However on the very last day when I heard about a thing called fundraising I was really tense and started to crib as I usually do…Hehe 

But before I proceed one significant thing that happened here too was the creation of another tribe. The name was quite similar to the tribe created at Smile …. And this time the name was Zingas….. At this moment I will like to thank the Zingas for bringing so much energy into my life and I admit the jokes of one of the Zingas are killingly creative

Then we obviously went pack to pack as much stuff as we can and trust me packing for six month long internship isn’t that easy. This was also a phase of transformation and just the feeling of been away from smile was difficult and yet at the same time I was dying to be at YFD….. It was so difficult to go through that but at the end things shaped up well.

Then the time to say bye to Smilers was difficult and it was quite an emotional moment to get farewell cards (Especially in Green color) and letter from Smilers….. Trust me you all did manage to bring tears to my eyes but smile was there on my face because I was and I am still sure that we will meet 

And then began the Pre departure training @ YFD and probably it has been one of the most interesting workshops that I have been part of. It included everything…. Creativity, Brainstorming, Discussion, Role plays, entertainment, Theatre and I will repeat killingly creative jokes. I was absurd on a few aspects … first and foremost was that I found a very special friend… hang on hang on … before you start making any assumptions, I will like to clarify … it was none other than my bag. Hehe 

The training was not short of action. We also prepared dinner on one of the days and everything prepared that day was delicious to say the least. Tamarind Rice, Palak Paneer, Dal … everything was fabulous.

But yeah I was a victim of pillow fight and it was painful to my spectacles toss up in the air and devastated in front my eyes. However Dusherra celebrations were fun and I bought a new Kurta as well that went matches well with my sweetheart bag. However just a day before we were supposed to leave, I was again lost and was wondering whom to ask what to do. I still remember this one conversation that I had with another Zingas and we shared our thoughts on the various clouds of apprehensiveness surrounding us. But that conversation managed to assured me which was really important for me and I will like to take this opportunity to thank my fellow Zinga. Oh … I have just lost on one thing that I will like to mention here … Traveling in the bus and Metro with Zingas has been really a memorable experience.

The day finally came and we left for our placements. As usual, I was lost again for a few days but my mentors enabled me to find my feat and the staff at Manthan has been wonderful. Youth for Development has been a experience of its kind and has managed me to be a more stable person now. The learning has been incredible and it’s been fun to interact and work with the Community Radio reporters. The children out here have often mesmerized me with their honest and simple questions …. Most importantly if bag was my first love … my second love as not far behind and its none other than the Ram Pyari Chai. I just love it At this moment I will like to take this opportunity to thank Lokashish Da and Tanmayee for the unforgettable support. I will also like to thank one of the Smilers who have been in constant touch with me and has motivated at very juncture. She has been one of my strongest support systems during the course of the internship. …. Oh God what a year it has been. I am pretty sure I will not be able to forget this year.

Thank you everyone for making this year special … I hope this is just the beginning.